Learning how to say ‘no’ when I really need to, without feeling insensitive, regretful, or overly worried that I might hurt or infuriate someone else was one of the most challenging things I had to learn.
I learnt that saying ‘no’ is not always negative. It could be as good or even better than a ‘yes’, depending on your circumstances. A ‘no’ does not mean you despise or loathe the other person. It is also for your sanity and peace of mind. In reality, You can’t disappoint anyone when you say ‘no’ with genuine reasons.
Rather, people disappoint themselves with the expectations they set for whom they would want you to be and what they expect you to do. It’s always their story. If they truly respect you, they would be understanding and not make you feel guilty on the basis of friendship.
You teach people how to treat you by deciding on what you would and won’t accept. Cease letting anyone take advantage of you. It is not your responsibility to entertain everyone and make them happy.
You should spend your precious time with people who bring out the best in you, who support and accept you just the way you are. Relationships in which you need to pretend are simply toxic. Being a people pleaser is equally toxic. If you don’t feel at ease with anyone, set boundaries.
I also discovered that you can never be exploited without your consent.
I am Dr.Mrs. Uchechi Chukwuma, born and raised in a conservative home but exposed to moderate and sometimes radical ideas at school. I am a trained linguist, educationist and guidance counsellor with many years of working with families and children.
Most especially, I am a wife and a mother who is very passionate of the intricacies of raising children.
The aim of this blog is to address psychological, behavioral and emotional issues that cause family problems. I am also very passionate of the roles of families in the development of children. I am committed to ensuring that children are appropriately conditioned to achieve their full potentials.